Glutton For Punishment!

What the hell is wrong with me?  Didn't I just say, that I was never going to another LDS mid-singles dance?

So, I was sitting at home last night by myself, my ex had the kids, and I was bored to death.  I started going stir crazy.  I promised myself that I would never sit at home, on a night my kids are gone.  But, seriously, I had nothing to do, and no one to do anything with.  The thought entered my mind, "Just go to the dance... what's the worst thing that could happen... if it's bad, you can turn around and go home."

So, at 9:45, I threw on some clothes, touched up my make-up and headed out the door.  I got in my car, and started driving down the road, shaking my head at myself as I drove. (That seems to be happening a lot lately!)

An hour later, I pulled into the parking lot.  The parking lot was packed.  I got really excited.  I just knew this was going to be a good one.  I thought to myself... "I am going in. I am going to make friends.  They are going to invite me to go out for pie at Denny's afterward.  I hate pie, but I will go and have fun!"

I walked in, some punk kid was at the door, taking money... well kind of, he just stared at me.  Now, looking back, I know what he was thinking, "Hey sexy lady, you are way too young to be hanging out here, let's bust this joint and go to McDonalds for a happymeal."

I walked into the cultural hall, and glanced around.  HOLY CRAP!  I didn't see anyone there who looked under 50!  The average age had to be 60 plus!  Cotton heads, everywhere! 

THIS IS MY DATING POOL?!!!!  You have got to be kidding me!  Where are all the single LDS men in my age range hiding?  Come out, come out, where ever you are!   I am horny and waiting... oops, did I just say that out loud.  Pretend I didn't just say that!

The scene before my eyes, was nothing short of scary!  It was like the scene in Dirty Dancing, where Baby walks into the room, carrying a watermelon.   Only, it was 70 year olds recreating the dancing parts!

I think I made the same face! 


OK, OK, it wasn't really that bad..... but....


it was crazy awkward!

I took deep breath, and walked through the room, hoping to recognize someone.  Maybe just, maybe, someone I chat with on-line will be there.  As I walked by two older ladies, I heard one whisper to the other, "Poor thing, she must be new on the scene, her boobs are still so perky!"  OK, I didn't really witness that, but in my mind it happened!

I headed into the restroom, this seems to be my "go to" place to calm my nerves and talk myself into things.  I looked in the mirror, yep, still cute... and walked back out.  I walked back through the cultural hall and right out the door and got back in my car.  Guess my little pep talk didn't work.

I sat in the car for 15 minutes, trying to decide what to do, and then, I drove home.  The worse part of it all, at midnight, I went to the drive-thru at Taco Bell and ordered a burrito supreme!